The B'nai B'rith magazine · 1927-07-01 · 10 (7.1927) · p. Seite 438

fflutnoredQfue Measured from the Neck Up CHIMON was standing on the bank of a river when a stranger, dressed in a bathing suit, approached and asked: "Is this river deep enough for diving?" "I never go in myself; however, yesterday I saw a man in there with water up to his neck. But—" "Was he a tall man?" interrupted the stranger. "Yes, very tall, but—" "Thanks. That's all I want to know. It's deep enough for me." And with these words the stranger dived gracefuHy into the stream. But his head became embedded in the mud which was just a foot below the surface, and he stood there feet uppermost. After he had extracted himself from the mud he demanded of Shimon: "Didn't you tell me you saw a tall man in here yesterday with the water up to his neck?" "So I did," Shimon answered, "but you didn't give me a chance to explain. When I saw the man he had just made the same mistake you did." —Jewish Daily Forward. Louis XXXII Must Be Twin Beds AN East Side couple had struck it lucky and began to furnish a sumptuous new apartment uptown. They went in for period furniture and among other things, ordered a Louis the Fourteenth bed. After measuring himself carefully against the bed, the husband said: "It's a beautiful bed, this Louie the Fourteenth, but it's too small." "All right," the wife agreed, "we'll exchange it for a Louis the Sixteenth." What's in a Name? DERELE probably believes with Hillel that "he who has acquired a good name has enriched his manhood." Berele visited his native village in Russia after a number of years in America. "Ah, Berele," a friend greeted him, "I hear that you have made a good name for yourself in America." "Oh, yes indeed, I have," Berele answered. "Here I was called Berele Finkelman, and in America I am 'Mister Fine.'" r>OME of our readers are keep- O ing their libraries well supplied with books by contributing jokes to this page. You know, Humoresque gives prizes of good books every month for the best stories. It's easy to win one. The chances are you're constantly hearing good Jewish yarns but immediately forget them. All you you have to do is jot them down and mail them to us, and likely as not you'll receive a book. We're sure your community has developed its own little jokes that are unknown to the rest of our readers. That is the interesting thing about Jewish humor. Every Jewish community creates its own brand typical of its life. Wherever Jews settle, jokes come into being, along with synagogues, schools and industries. We're told that even the refugees in Mexico are developing a Mexican-Jewish humor. Winners of books this month are Sarah Marder, 23 Spring St., Taunton, Mass.; Harrison Gans, U21 Twenty-first Ave., San Francisco, and Mrs. J. Schwartz, 72U Hamilton Blvd., Ft. Wayne, Ind. The Retort Discourteous C APHIR, a Jewish satirist of Austria, once was accused of writing for money by a jealous rival. "I do not act thus," said the rival, drawing himself up proudly, "I write for fame." "I admit the soft impeachment," Saphir rejoined, "every one writes for that which he most grievously lacks— I lack money, you lack fame." It was the same Saphir who was ordered out of Bavaria by the king to whom Saphir's satire had become exceedingly distasteful. The king was a dabbler in poetry and had written a book of verse. Upon being asked whether he could manage to get out of Bavaria in a short time, Saphir answered: "0, certainly. For if my own feet will not carry me with sufficient rapidity I can always borrow some of the superfluous feet in his Majesty's last volume of verses." 438 Dutiful Son A MAN had ordered a load of hay from a farmer. At lunch time the farmer's boy came to say that the load of hay had upset in the street. The man assured the boy that the mishap could easily be corrected, and urged him to have a bite to eat before going for the hay. "Papa won't like it," the boy responded. But the man answered that he would fix it with papa, and insisted that the boy remain for lunch. After the meal the host asked: "Now aren't you glad you stayed?" "Papa won't like it," the lad repeated. "And why should your father object?" the other questioned. "Well, you see, papa is under the hay," the boy answered.—Jewish Daily Forward. The Diplomatic Guest *\Jr UDEL came to a friend's house for a brief visit. At the end of a month he had not yet even hinted the date of his departure. So the friend and his wife decided upon a plan that would speed Yudel on his way. The wife was to make some soup which the husband would say was no good. A heated argument would ensue, and Yudel would be called upon for his opinion. No matter which one he would agree with, the other would pretend to be angry and order him out of the house. Next day the soup was prepared and the argument started as planned. At the climax, Yudel was asked to judge. "Well," Yudel responded, "seeing that I am to remain here another month, I will not take sides, because it's better there shouldn't be any hard feelings."-—Jewish Daily Forward.